I was surfing Interwaves recently and came across a couple of lengthy blogposts about some of the stupider monsters that have popped up in various versions of the world’s most popular roleplaying game. Some the stupidest have been monsters that combine normal animals. Since I don’t want to be left out of the stupid combo-animal carnival, I humbly submit the catbirdopus, which combines a domestic cat, a hawk, and an octopus.
CR 1/2; XP 200
N Small animal (aquatic)
Init +3; Senses low-light vision, scent; Perception +5
AC 15, touch 14, flat-footed 12 (+3 Dex, +1 natural, +1 size)
hp 9 (2d8)
Fort +3, Ref +6, Will +1
Defensive Abilities ink cloud
Speed 20 ft., fly 30 ft. (average), swim 15 ft., jet 100 ft.
Melee 2 talons +5 (1d3-2), bite +5 (1d3-2 plus poison), tentacles +3 (grab)
Special Attacks poison (Fort 11)
Str 7, Dex 16, Con 11, Int 2, Wis 13, Cha 6
Base Atk +1; CMB -2; CMD +1 (cannot be tripped)
Feats Multiattack (B), Weapon Finesse
Skills Climb +5, Escape Artist +8, Fly +12, Perception +5, Stealth +13; Racial Modifiers +2 Climb, +5 Escape Artist, +4 Perception, +6 Stealth
Ink Cloud (Ex): A catbirdopus can emit a 10-foot-radius sphere of ink once per minute as a free action. The ink provides total concealment in water, and persists for 1 minute.
Jet (Ex): A catbirdopus can jet backward once per round as a full-round action, at a speed of 100 feet. It must move in a straight line while jetting, and does not provoke attacks of opportunity when it does so.
Poison (Ex): Bite – injury; save Fort DC 11; frequency 1/round for 6 rounds; effect 1 Str; cure 1 save. The save DC is Constitution-based.
Environment temperate and hot water
Organization solitary or pair
Starting Statistics: Size Small; AC +1 natural armor; Speed 20 ft., fly 30 ft. (average), swim 15 ft., jet 100 ft.; Attack 2 talons +5 (1d3-2), bite +5 (1d3), tentacles +3 (grab); Ability Scores Str 7, Dex 16, Con 11, Int 2, Wis 13, Cha 6; Special Qualities jet, low-light vision, ink cloud, scent.
4th-Level Advancement: Attack bite (1d3 plus poison [frequency 1 round (6), effect 1 Str damage, cure 1 save, Con-based DC]); Ability Scores Str +2, Con +2; Special Attacks poison.